Gods, Fuck You Facebook

I really wish I didn’t have to use Facebook sometimes. They are such lame pains in the ass about this name business.

As you may know, they logged me out of my account last Thursday morning, telling me I had to prove to them that I was using my real name. Why they couldn’t just google me, I do not know. Since I use that name on both of my own websites, plus every online account I’ve ever had, it seems like that would be the easiest way. But no, they gave me one week to get my documents in order.

The next day I sent them their required ID (my wedding certificate, and 2 pieces of mail from different senders–neither of which were hand written). After 6 days, I heard nothing. Suddenly today, I’m locked out again. I resent everything, and am still waiting to hear. Now not only can I not use my Facebook account–I can’t use any account that I usually sign into via Facebook. So no YouTube, no commenting on various websites, all that annoying shit.

And like an idiot, I have business correspondences that happen through Facebook, so I can’t do some of my regular work. I don’t even know how long this bullshit will take.

Funny thing, when I was paying them for advertising, or back when I’d occasionally pay for game perks–they had no such desire to confirm my identity. Now suddenly it’s some huge problem?

Keep in mind, that this is a site that says right in their TOS that they don’t have the ability to keep our info safe. Yet they want a pic of my driver’s license (even though I don’t drive), my marriage certificate, and all this other shit? Just to prove that nobody is impersonating me? Fuck that shit, Facebook. Fuck it right in the ear.

Worst of all, they couch these intrusive requirements as a matter of safety for me, and truthiness for them. Bullshit. It’s as much bullshit as when Google tells me that giving them my phone number makes me “safe” when all it really does is increase the amount of scam texts and calls I get. All this name bullshit combined with their facial recognition software makes this something downright Orwellian.

So why couldn’t they look over my shit when I sent it 6 days ago? Nobody knows. You can’t talk to or even Email an actual person. I have roughly a dozen bylines using this name on different sites: LJ, DW, Kinkly, ZZN, Associated Content, Geekbinge, Puckermob, Articlecats, Disqus, and a few more that are eluding me at the moment, plus my own pro website, Amazon, Under the Bed, and The Horror Within, not to mention the scads and oodles of fiction I’ve published.

What a fucking pain in the ass.

My name is Wednesday Lee Friday, and I despise Facebook’s bullshit policies.
And we have always been at war with Eurasia.

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